Hydromancy

Hydromancy

For some reason I'm suddenly not getting my daily Word of the Day email. Hmmm, should I take it personally? Are they trying to tell me something? I'm going to say no. I mean, that would be like saying that the cat only lets me pick her up when it's feeding time because she's after food. Please, she's a cat, she craves attention.

Anyway, I spent the weekend with the 'rents at their assisted-living residence and noticed that none of the older residents listen to music - some have radios, but no one has a stereo. It really got me thinking about what it'll be like if I move into one someday. Will I have all my albums and CDs? What about the wide-screen 3D TV and the DVDs? Will I still have the Victrola and the 78s? The 'sband and I are gonna need big rooms if we take our entertainment with us.  

Let's do a little hydromancy sans water and listen to a conversation between the caregivers...

"So, what did he grow up with? 78s, albums, or CDs?"
"I don't know - all three I guess."
"That's impossible. There's like a hundred years between them. Why doesn't he get rid of all that crap? No one's owned any of that crap in years."
"Well don't tell him that, he'll do that stupid shaking-of-the-fist-in-your-general-direction thing. So annoying."
"He was listening to that stupid disco again today."
"I don't think that was disco. I think that was turn-of-the-century Trance. Don't confuse them in front of him. He gets totally pissed."
"Why does he always refer to his husband as 'the 'sband'? Phreeque."
"Uh...'phreeque'? You realize that's how he'd spell it."
"What? Oh dammit, he's rubbin' off on me! OK, so what's with him always going on about 'the beauty that is, you know,' but then never saying who the hell 'you know' is? No, I don't know who 'you know' is, and giving me that creepy grin and wrinkling his nose does not help explain it."

And that, unfortunately, is what concerns me the most about Future Me. Right now I can make a joke that I think is pretty funny and people, well, if they feel the need, people just simply ignore me. In the future will they go from being slightly confused to thinking I'm truly losing it? And now you know what keeps me awake at night.