Desideratum

Desideratum

"Desi who?" you may query.

Desi Deratum, of course! This might be a good name for a drag queen, but I'm thinking not.

"It means I'm the most important, most desirable drag queen here!" hands sweeping outwards to convey a sense of space.
"Uh...OK...?"

Everybody, of course, knows that the Aries drag queen, no matter her name, is the most important of DQs (and of course they would be correct). In fact, I think I could humbly say that the Ram* is the desideratum of, well, basically, the human race - no offense to you other signs. I only believe in astrology so much, but, you know, when something is so obviously correct in some aspects, you can't completely deny it. Besides, denying stuff just makes life that much more doldrumatic.

It took me a while, though, before I realized that I couldn't just use my birth sign as an excuse for things. In kindergarten I could never settle down enough to relax during nap time. Drove me nuts! All this sensory overload and we were suddenly supposed to just turn it off and take a nap!?!?

"I'm an Aries, I can't just settle down on demand!"

The teacher was not impressed. Nor were my parents who decidedly did not believe in such things. Nor was the mayor. But here's the rub,** if I'm not desideratum in the extended def' of the word which I just created and is now lodged in my head, why was the mayor involved in a kindergartner's nap*** time? I never did get an answer. I wrote a letter to the town newspaper asking them what was going on that the mayor had nothing better to do than get involved in a kid's gnap time when there were roads that needed grading. But unfortunately it wasn't until many years later that I was able to properly convey my thoughts through letter writing, so by the time it got to the editor, the paper just wasn't interested in publishing a letter about something that had happened 20 years previously. Jerks.

*I don't use the word "Arien" because it's just too linked to...well, you know.
**That's Shakespeare, sort of. Impressed?
***Or as I like to call it "gnap." You know silent g's sort of turn me on.