Bloviate

Bloviate

Well, as I've mentioned in the past, since the only big words I know are odious and Archimedes, no one can claim I'm a bloviate. On the other hand, since I sometimes write like I think I'm a cow, does that make me a boviate? (Get it? No? Eh, yer not missing much.)

But anyway, I wanted to apologize for the last couple of days. Between having a house guest and not getting the WotD email (again!) it completely slipped my mind. And yesterday...well...going out for an early breakfast can take a lot out of you...I can't help it - I needed a nap, so sue me! (Or better yet, find me a job and I'll no longer be able to take morning naps...that'll show me!)

Speaking of bovines, it's August, and that can only mean one thing. That's right: Christmas shopping!! Yeeees, it's time for deck the halls and light the lights and turn the beer green! I started looking to see what I could get for the little ankle-biter nephews and nieces and have come up with the perfect gift. It's both fun and educational! Are you thinking what I'm thinking? You are if you think like I do, and if you do think like I do, then you're thinking...that's right: the perfect gift for kids from two to 102!!*

So excited! Hurry up, trees! Turn your autumnal colors so we know we're on our way! Sleighing and sledding! Cookies and candy! Cinnamon and spice! Mistletoe and Mad Cow Mini Microbes! Oh yea, the holiday spirit is here!

On the other hand, I wish we could all gather together so we could view and discuss this other product they sell. It's so bizarre in so many ways. It's like some weird South Park parody - the description, the ring of beads around the head, the fact that's it's "just plain fun." I hate to sound like a Hyperbolic Harry, but this HAS to be one of the most surreal things I've ever seen for sale to the general public. It's this thing. Yea, I know. I feel like I should write more, but what more is there? I cannot top that.

*Unfortunately in our consumer testing this product was found to be unfun by the average person under the age of two and over the age of 102. Not sure why, but the public doesn't lie, God love 'em!